Another 1 of my super boh leow conversation

Alvin- Awesomeness says:
eh she want u to buy car with her
?????? says:
err...
?????? says:
i think i got no $ for 1907 model lancer leh
?????? says:
should be very x! cuz so old leow
@@c_gal~running........ says:
wei
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
oh wait... ya lor.. like 102 years liao
?????? says:
yar lor
?????? says:
so old. muz be worth a lot of $
?????? says:
u tink it runs on normal petrol or coal?
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
maybe msia will claim it's their car
?????? says:
but malaysia invented car mah
?????? says:
they oso invented shit
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
haha...　
?????? says:
so i think they can claim all our shits all theirs
@@c_gal~running........ says:
wa lao
@@c_gal~running........ says:
u all hor
@@c_gal~running........ says:
v evil
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
eh i gtg do work.. so cindy asking u to go with her buy second hand car
?????? says:
but hor cindy, u buy the 1902 car leow is bery mafun de
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
my friend bought a toyota starlet 92 left 2 years for 6k
?????? says:
i think no spare part leow & not easy to buy coal nowadays
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
i hear that one wont die one. nuclear holocaust also will survive kind
@@c_gal~running........ says:
sai la
?????? says:
haha. so u tink nxt time we shit muz pay boh?
?????? says:
check with ur malaysian wife leh alvin
?????? says:
wat's e levy? cuz too x then i try not to shit so much leow
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
er.. but they lowering the maid levy for indonesia
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
think they want to claim that maids originate from msia liao
@@c_gal~running........ says:
tts v hard for u lo.. u r so full o shit
?????? says:
u so lucky! got malaysian wife originated from malaysia
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
ya lor.. she can cook hainanese chicken rice, laksa, and chilli crab
?????? says:
so u tink 2morow malaysia will come to sillypore & claim back all e malaysian wifes boh?
?????? says:
so heng lor u!
?????? says:
so remember to check with ur wife on the shit levy ok?
?????? says:
& tis discussion is so boh leow. i got to post it in my blog leow
@@c_gal~running........ says:
both of u r so full of shit ley
@@c_gal~running........ says:
pls thr is no discussion lo.. is only u talkin lo
?????? says:
i tinkn nxt time i grow old i can publish a book on sibei boh leow, yet interesting & sibei smart conversation by me. hahahahahaha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
n hor ur shit levy is most exp coz u r so full of shit... u better go take up part time job
?????? says:
but at least i know 07 lancer is made in 2007 & not ask Q like how old is ur lancer huh? hahahahaha
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
ok.. checked. 1kg levy 50rm.. but if u pay the person weighing it 20rm can liao
?????? says:
i mean how old is ur 2007 lancer huh? hahahaha
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
fuck leh ck..
?????? says:
my dad malaysian got discount boh?
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
so he can cook chilli crab ah
?????? says:
if got then can i claim all shit in my famili from him alone?
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
ok u're ignored liao
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
cindy when u intending to get car
@@c_gal~running........ says:
i nv see properly can anot
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
go sg carmart look see lor
?????? says:
can. he oso can cook bak kut teh & chicken lice
@@c_gal~running........ says:
u ppl so mean ley
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
go ur house eat bahkutteh leh
?????? says:
onli ur wife can come. we onli welcome malaysian
@@c_gal~running........ says:
i love bak ku teh
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
and when u getting more otah
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
cb
?????? says:
cuz they r the smartest ting on earth. they invented so many tings
?????? says:
u tink if i give up my sillypore citizenship & becum malaysian then i will becum smarter boh?
?????? says:
then i can invent someting or i can juz claim a lot of tings r invented by me?
?????? says:
& cindy, dun be so evil leh! eat bak ku teh later eat ur relatives by accident how!
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
nahbeh u really verbal diarrhoea leh
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
ha
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
marcus jio sprint thurs
?????? says:
thurs? thought we going to the gym leow?
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
before gym
?????? says:
ok. wat time?
?????? says:
630 at tpy?
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
think so
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
k la gtg
?????? says:
bye. ok. let me noe
@@c_gal~running........ says:
i nt scare
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
all the best for ur car shopping cindy
@@c_gal~running........ says:
coz all r ur relatives
?????? says:
y u say these kind of mean tings abt alvin!
@@c_gal~running........ says:
hai alvin is nicer.. though he is oso v evil for tellin u
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
and go watch super junior 'sorry sorry'
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
haha
?????? says:
i going to watch rtm 2
?????? says:
i want to invent things oso
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
fuck off
Alvin- Awesomeness says:
night asses
@@c_gal~running........ says:
haha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
watch ntv7
?????? says:
i cannot belive it. alvin wants to F cindy!!!
@@c_gal~running........ says:
sai la
?????? says:
he said it leh
?????? says:
neber noe he oso like pork. hehe
@@c_gal~running........ says:
he likes u ok.
@@c_gal~running........ says:
u 2 gays
?????? says:
i am not but i cannot stop pple from loving me lor
?????? says:
cuz i am so lovable. hahahahahahaha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
*puke*
?????? says:
dun jealous leh!
?????? says:
at least alvin likes to eat pork mah
@@c_gal~running........ says:
wa... i need to be jealous of u meh
@@c_gal~running........ says:
n no lo... alvin likes mutton
?????? says:
tat is quite true oso
?????? says:
u r more like a pig than a goat
?????? says:
my mistake
?????? says:
haha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
pls go n die
?????? says:
i tried but hell too packed leow. hahaha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
dun blur
@@c_gal~running........ says:
u haven try hard enuff
?????? says:
i swear i did but they told me u r going soon leow & after you there is no more space in hell leow. hahahahahahahaha
@@c_gal~running........ says:
aiya... den u can go 1st lo
@@c_gal~running........ says:
coz i think i sure live longer than u one
@@c_gal~running........ says:
hahaha
?????? says:
think they prefer bbq pork leh. hehe

　

Evian Roller Babies

Breakdancing baby Yamakasi. I just had to post this ad. It's beyond cute (though creepy to some). Wish Lackie could master 1/10 of these tykes' seamless little feats. :p

Another boh leow conversation

?????? says:
& dun be so jealous leh
?????? says:
l oso neber look down on u for using cheapo faceshop product leh
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
er... pls lor
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
nivea is like the best lor
?????? says:
although u can tell it is not working cuz u still look like fuck mah
?????? says:
while i look like lee hsien loong now lor
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
lam pa lor
?????? says:
ur black head r so big tat i thought u got 2 nose lor. hahahaha
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
cannot be lor
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
cos the seaweed thing is very branded lor
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
from korea leh
?????? says:
hahahaha. korea is the poor man's japan
?????? says:
korean bery happy to be mistaken as jap but not the other way rd lor. hahahahahahaha
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
so where is sisley frm
Alvin- Sisley for sissies says:
bring tmr leh so i can show u how to maximise its effects
?????? says:
err... i tink it is Krypton but my cousin says it is from france lor
?????? says:
err... my cousin says it dun work on pigs de leh. hahahahaha
?????? says:
so i tink u better stick to ur 2 nose blackhead

Sunday Dragons 1st trophy

We have finally won someting in a major tournament. We came in 3rd in the Minor Final for the inter business & club open. I am not extremly happy cuz I noe we can do better but yet we chose not to. I feel this 3rd place in a Minor Final is just a reminder that we are not good enough to make the Grand final. Haha.

Alvin is right to say this is the best the team can do at the kind of effort they are willing to put in so I cannot expect more. The pig is also right when he said that we are now behind PLK although we started ard the same time. We used to be better than them but they are now ahead of us leow. Our aim should be to beat PLK 1st before we can dream on taking on the bigger teams. ZY commented we can still improve & we juz need to lose some weight & improve on our strength. Err... of cuz we noe that lah. We also noe if we train more then we should get better results. We put in more then we up our chances of better returns but noeing & doing are 2 different tings ba. Haha.

Overall I am still glad we did better & improve on our past results, especially the gals. They also got into a Minor Final in the Gals Open. Really fantastic effort! Really happy for them & I expect better results from them if they are willing to put in more which I noe they are capable of & willing to.

Feeling really tired after this race. Dun noe why? Wonder whether it is the age or realilty bites??? hahaha

Alvin is GAY!!!

Alvin- Swine says:
eh.. if i use blackhead remover cream, then after that must use toner?
?????? says:
err... how e fuck i noe?
?????? says:
my cousin said yes
?????? says:
my cousin was tinking which gal asked me tis q. hahahaha
Alvin- Swine says:
er...
Alvin- Swine says:
pls lor
Alvin- Swine says:
guys also got blackhead one leh
Alvin- Swine says:
she got use greentea blackhead cream from face shop before?
?????? says:
but where got guys use toner de?
Alvin- Swine says:
but must close the pores right? so must use toner?　
?????? says:
she said yar
Alvin- Swine says:
if not bacteria and dirt will collect and cos a pimple right?
?????? says:
but she said face shop stuff is for cheapskate. hahahahaha
Alvin- Swine says:
nahbeh
?????? says:
someting like tat. hahahaha
Alvin- Swine says:
how to use that one ah?
Alvin- Swine says:
the greentea one
Alvin- Swine says:
is it just apply on nose and wash off? or must wait?
Alvin- Swine says:
cos dunno how it removes the blackhead
?????? says:
u muz let it dry on ur nose then u peel off
?????? says:
u idiot!!!
?????? says:
& my cousin said sk2 is e bestest
Alvin- Swine says:
how to peel off? it doesn't peel leh
Alvin- Swine says:
rub off can la... but doesn't peel like pore pack kind
?????? says:
my cousin is really sad tat some of my fres can't read
Alvin- Swine says:
i not sammi cheng leh
Alvin- Swine says:
er... it's in korean
Alvin- Swine says:
the back
?????? says:
hahahahaha. then who u bought it from?
Alvin- Swine says:
if i noe korean i won't be stuck with msian liao
Alvin- Swine says:
someone come to sch and sell
Alvin- Swine says:
so i pretend to buy for shuwen for myself lor
?????? says:
true oso. my cousin said it is either peel off or rub off
Alvin- Swine says:
ok.. actually if u save this conversation it's more gay lor
?????? says:
i am going to post it on my blog leow

A friend in his food

Look what my BIL found in the sambal on his plate last night?


I can't help but shudder just looking at the pic and imagine leh, it could've been chewed and swallowed if undiscovered. Ew ew ew EW!!!

With the hoo-ha surrounding the food poisoning deaths of late, I don't think the authorities are going to go easy on this one when we report it. It's one thing to know at the back of your head that food prepared outside of home is never hygienic, but it's quite another to actually see a bloody cockroach in your food.

BIL was furious and started kicking up a ruckus with the stall owner. "Is this how you run your stall? What happens if I had eaten this? You're history if I report you!" To which, the boss apologized and offered the excuse that someone had not covered the pot of chili properly the night before. Uhh, excuse me, our problem izzit?

The best part was after we showed them the offensive cockroach, they did not even bother to remove the contaminated pot of chili. It was still sitting there waiting for some hapless patron to scoop, eat and die of food poisoning. Redemption FAIL.

They offered to waive the rice off the bill, and we were like WTF lor. So buay sui. Want to waive, waive the whole goddamn bill or don't even bother. Damage control FAIL. First thing to shut a patron's mouth after such a damning thing has occurred is to waive the entire bill. Not that we would've taken it, cuz we have that much integrity, and we would still report this case anyway to save others from the terrible fate of munching on cockroaches.

Anyway, if you look closely at the pic, the cockroach is missing half its body. BIL was convinced the other half was already swimming in his stomach. Ew ew ew EW!!!!!!!!!! I had a roiling tummy and diarrhoea after that dreadful meal. Nevermind that I suffer from occasional bouts of diarrhoea. I am convinced it was the cockroach that brought it on.

Lackie, being the evil little cow that she is, was damn happy her dad ate a cockroach. Kept gloating and gleefully shrieking, "My daddy ate a cockroach! Hahahahahaa! Daddy loves to eat cockroaches!" Faint.

Babi's 32nd Bird Day

My smerri babi turned 32 today. And he was not a pleased moorwen. Kept lamenting about what an old man he's become. "Embrace your old age with grace." I told him. "Welcome to another day closer to the grave." Morbid lah, I know. But that's the way we talk to one other. Hey, whatever keeps our marriage afloat. :p

For the emperor's big day, I conspired with my MIL to surprise him with a homemade birthday cake. I put two and two together and came up with the bright idea to make sweet potato huat kway. Since MIL is so into her huat kway-making phase now and my babi is a such huge fan of sweet potato, well, you get my drift lah.

TA-DAAH!! Presenting my babi's birthday cake (completely unfindable anywhere else)...


It was supposed to be a surprise and I already pakat with MIL and FIL to keep it hush-hush so that we could present it to him, birthday candle and all. But big-mouth BIL had to blow the secret by announcing to my babi the minute he flounced in through the front door. "Aye, they made birthday cake for you leh." *slaps forehead* DUH!

Birthday presents. Who can do without them? No one, that's who. Despite my babi's violent protests that no pressies were required, blah blah, I could just tell that he did not mean one word of it. Like any other pressie-hungering moorwen, he was just gagging for me to bestow upon him an awe-inspiring gift that would prove just how deep my love for him is. Kekekekeke! After all, why would anyone keep hinting a month before his birthday..."Aye, don't buy for me anything ah. Really leh, I don't need anything." Ingenious. LOL!

I mean, seriously, can you say no when your hubby makes this face at you...


....while standing in the midst of some very fine watches at Dickson? Ok ok, so I caved in to my babi's sad puppy eyes and dropped some serious dough on his birthday pressie. I mean, can any softhearted woman say no to a face like this? I think not lor.

So I whipped out my plastic and handed it over for Babi's much-lemmed-for BALL watch. Akan datang for a pic on this bank-breaking investment. It's ok...all I have to do is eat giam pia and grass for remaining months of 2009. About time I went on a diet anyway. Besides, anything for my moorwen is worth it. :p

Finisher of 42km

Got the cert. 1 strike off my list & many more to go. Timing sucks!

She is ready to accept Christ

Yesterday was Day 2 of Chinese New Year and we were all gathered at my aunt's place for the usual festivities. Halfway through the nicest lunch I've eaten there in nine years (ayam buah keluah!!!), a family arrived for visitation. They were introduced as the family of my mom's cousin (he is a pastor). I feel a need to mention that because I have a pretty low tolerance for Hallelujahs and their kind.

The young stranger that came with them sat down with my 92-year old quadriplegic Ah Ma, held her hands, looked deeply and earnestly into her eyes for a good half an hour. Even then, it didn't once occur to cynical old me that he was brainwashing her; it just struck me as odd that someone would display such keen interest in an immobile nonagenarian. Apparently this Brylcreemed-to-death tub of lard was my mom's cousin's daughter's boyfriend (this would be the first time we were meeting him).

So there I was, seated at the dinner table, licking inky buah keluah off my fingers and partaking in a lively conversation with my dad about internet TV. Suddenly, Mr Brylcreem stood up and grandly announced to my aunt in the presence of all, "I have spoken to your mom. She is ready to accept Christ." Jesus, all that was missing were the trumpets that heralded his announcement.

KNN, all conversation immediately ground to an abrupt and stunned halt. You could almost go around scooping everyone's jaws off their laps. I think I may have squirted buah keluah out of my nostrils from being subjected to such trauma. My aunt (who is herself a Christian) recovered her composure and firmly told him, "I don't think so. My mom is senile and barely knows what she's saying. Five minutes later, she will forget she even said that."

Mind you hor, my Ah Ma has been a staunchly pious Taoist devout her entire life, until stroke rendered her a near-vegetable and senility ravaged her lao tao nao. When she was mobile, she would worship and pray to every Taoist deity until the cows came home. How dare this pompous s.o.b. guest of a guest presume to practice his brand of Christian fanaticism in my aunt's home! We were, of course, too polite to tell the jackass off to his face, but the bombarding came fast and furious after his group left.

My dad (he's agnostic) was especially tulan, ranting, "It's precisely the predatory behavior of fanatics like these that besmirch the good name of Christianity! He was preying on Grandma's fears to manipulate her into converting." Everyone agreed that it wasn't right. If and when any one of us decides to embrace religion, we know exactly where and who to turn to without being told.

I know it's irrational to be tulan with my Ah Ma, given her pitiful circumstances, but I am. She is actually entertaining thoughts of converting this late in life because she felt that Taoism let her down. What the fuck?? I cannot tahan simpleton mentality like this lor. Her sense of entitlement where religion is concerned is astounding. To her 简单头脑, religion is an investment that should and must reap rich rewards and earn her a rightful place in Heaven *major eyeball rolling*. The fact that she's been supposedly pious her whole life and still winds up in the state that she is today...her puny mind just cannot compute how and why. Frankly I'm quite disgusted that she banked in religion for her own selfish agenda. Not to sound harsh or mean, but what distinguishes her from the suicide bombers? Both are fanatics (albeit in different degrees) in pursuit of a common ultimate goal...to get their asses through the Pearly Gates.

If you're guessing that I'm not too fond of Ah Ma, you're right. I've never liked her attitude towards religion and how she's always imposed on her loved ones, bossing them around like they're chess pieces on a board. It's a known fact that the Nonyas are very much a matriarchal society, and until her physical downfall, she'd always ruled her family with an iron fist. She refused to let my mom pursue her dream of flying because "air-stewardesses are sluts who sleep with pilots." *peng san* She was damn heng to have my mom as her daughter lor, everything also "yes, Ah Mak". Because if she kena me as her daughter, I sure aspire to be a bargirl and marry a Hokkien butcher just to spite her.

As for whether or not she should convert to Christianity, there's a time and place for such solemnities to be decided/executed. During a CNY visitation with an unfamiliar household isn't one of them lor. I liken these sanctimonious preachers to demons who should be cast out of homes, minds and bodies. So there!